How to Actually Stick to Your New Year’s Resolutions (Without Making Yourself Miserable)

New Year’s resolutions have a reputation for being more “new year, same habits by February.” We start out with the best intentions—“This is my year!”—but then life happens, motivation fades, and suddenly that new habit starts collecting metaphorical dust.

It doesn’t have to be this way (I say to myself)… Changing your habits and sticking to your resolutions can actually be enjoyable—something you look forward to instead of dread. In fact, you must do it this way, because you cannot torture yourself into sustainable growth. You need the right mindset, a game plan, and a little self-compassion.

It is also important to note that our natural and biological start of the “new year” is at the beginning of spring time, when the earth thaws, and nature comes “back to life”. It was only after the advent of the Gregorian calendar that New Years moved to the middle of winter. It is totally normal and acceptable to rest and recharge during the winter months, instead of starting new goals.

I personally enjoy working towards my resolutions year round, and find it exciting to match it up to the beginning of a new calendar year, but not everyone will feel this way. New goals and resolutions should make you feel good, and excited, not stressed or anxious. So take your time. These tips will help you no matter when you decide to change your habits.

Why Mindset Matters

If your resolutions feel like a punishment (“I should lose weight” or “I should stop scrolling so much”), you’re already setting yourself up for failure. Stop “shoulding” all over yourself (and others). That kind of thinking sucks the joy out of the process. Instead, try reframing your goals as positive choices you get to create for a better life.

For example, instead of “I need to eat healthier,” think, “I want to feel energized and take care of myself.” The difference seems small, but this simple shift helps you focus on what you’re gaining, not what you’re giving up.

The Science of Sticking to It

Willpower is extremely overrated. The real key to lasting change is habits—those automatic little routines your brain loves to rely on. To build new habits that stick, use the “cue-routine-reward” system your brain already relies on:

    1.    Cue: Something that reminds you to do the habit (e.g., putting your workout clothes out the night before).

    2.    Routine: The habit itself (e.g., walking for 10 minutes or drinking water before coffee).

    3.    Reward: Something that feels good right after (e.g., a mini victory dance or checking it off your to-do list).

Here are a few practical tips to make this work (using health & fitness as an exaple):

    •    Start Small (Like Really Small): Shrink your goal until it feels almost too easy. Want to start running? Commit to putting on your sneakers and stepping outside. That’s it. Once you’ve mastered that baby step, you can build on it.

    •    Attach It to an Existing Habit: Pair your new habit with something you already do. For instance, if you always watch Youtube after work, lift some dumbbells during commercial breaks. Or if you like to snack in front of the tv, swap chips for veggies with hummus.

    •    Make It Obvious: Set up visual reminders for your habit. Want to drink more water? Keep a filled water bottle on your desk at all times. Want to read instead of scroll? Put the book on your pillow so you can’t ignore it.

Finding Joy in the Process

One of the biggest reasons resolutions fail is that they feel like a chore. Nobody wants to spend their time doing something that feels boring or miserable. So, how can you make the process enjoyable?

    •    Celebrate Small Wins: Progress is never about perfection; it’s about showing up. Every time you stick to your habit, even in the smallest way, give yourself credit. You’re showing up for yourself which is a victory in itself. Acknowledge your effort—it matters.

    •    Add Something You Love: Pair your habit with something fun that doesn’t detract from your goals. If you’re trying to work out, listen to your favorite podcast. If you’re meal prepping, watch a show you love in the background.

    •    Turn It Into “You Time”: Instead of seeing your new habit as one more thing on your to-do list, treat it as a way to take care of yourself. A morning walk, journaling, or even organizing your space can become something you look forward to when it’s framed as the act of self-care that it is.

A Few More Tips to Keep You Going

    •    Focus on Consistency, Not Perfection: Missing days doesn’t mean you’ve failed. The key is to get back on track as soon as possible. Getting back up, no matter how much you stumble, is how resilience is built. Compounded progress over time is what truly counts.

    •    Track Your Progress: Whether it’s a journal, an app, a simple calendar, or progress pics, keeping track of your streaks can help you stay motivated. There’s something deeply satisfying about seeing those little checkmarks add up. Plus it can put into perspective the changes you probably won’t notice in day-to-day life.

    •    Get Support: Share your goals with a trusted person, find a good coach, or join a group (in real life or online). Accountability and encouragement go a long way.

One Step at a Time

Here’s the thing: resolutions aren’t about flipping a switch and becoming a new person overnight. They’re about building small, meaningful habits that add up to big changes over time. Be kind to yourself, celebrate every bit of progress, and remember—you’re not aiming for perfection. You’re just showing up, one step at a time, for the life you want. Focus on the type of person you want to be, and have love and patience for yourself every day. Changing ingrained habits is one of the most challenging things a human can set out to do.

You’ve got this! And if you stumble (stumbling is borderline guaranteed), don’t worry—you can start fresh anytime, not just on January 1.